Sunday, December 21, 2008

My Year in Review

This week, I have been pondering my 2008……did it measure up to my expectations? Did I accomplish everything I set out to do?? Would I consider it a good year?

My life tends to express itself in themes - themes in lessons, themes for challenges, themes in relationships. 2008 was my year to be brave and my year for change. Looking back, 2008 is going to be one of my favorite years - there was just so much discovery, creativity, joy and learning. In 2008, I learned to truly be brave and to live my life on purpose.

The year started with my girlfriends sitting around the table in my new house - boxes were in every corner - toasting to a happy and prosperous 2008 with a glass of champagne. I had just moved into my house and my divorce was almost finalized. The movers had just left, the painter had been fired, and the champagne glasses were the first items to be unpacked. Sitting around the table were my strong and supportive women - the fabulous women of the Board of Directors (so we call ourselves). We encouraged each other to press onward and upward in 2008 - to be prosperous - to be brave.

My 2007 ended with this blog on Myspace… December 29, 2007

I have just spent an eternity packing the things I have accumulated over the last 20 years of life and sorting them into piles of "his" and "hers.." But how do you really determine his and hers when a life was shared??

My new life - the life all my own - the life I create for myself……it was a concept I embraced with open arms…looking back, this year included:

My first date since I was 22 years old…and the ensuing girlfriend conversations of whether it actually was a date….
Having a house of my very own….
Packing 16 years worth of memories…..and knowing what to leave…..
Firing my painter….and then dealing with his wife….
Moving into a winterized home and having to figure out how to turn on the main water supply…..a truly traumatic experience as I did NOT want to call the soon-to-be-X…
Having a guy friend come over to hang my closet shelves because I was clueless….
Having to support myself for the first time in my life…..
Crying on my staircase because I felt so overwhelmed…….many, many times….
Joining a book club..
Throwing myself a birthday party…..and loving every minute of it!!
Learning to speak French…
Buying my first lawnmower….
Traveling to France……then Napa Valley….then Greece and Turkey…
Falling in love……and then realizing we weren’t right for each other….
Having my daughter move to Colorado and realizing she would never live at home again…
Remembering how to ski…
Creating strong female friendships - creating strong guy-friend relationships…
Becoming a mentor to teenage girls….
Taking a polo lesson….
Having surgery - a partial hysterectomy - and letting my girlfriends take care of me….
Changing careers….
Learning to paint….
Shoveling my driveway - for the first time
And putting my life “out there” in the form of a blog.

My 2008 has been a joy to discover….the resolutions I made last year created a theme to keep me pressing onward and upward

I felt like the grinch taking all of the presents in Who-ville....

Somehow, items I haven't seen in 10 or 15 years now have grave importance in my life... items that would have gone into the garage sale box are now lovingly packed into boxes to be shipped an hour away and possibly never seen again...

But.... the BIG question is how two adults can agree on who gets what house, where the kids stay, and who pays for college but have to seriously (but politely) negotiate who gets the Pizzelle maker that was used all of one time…10 years ago....

Suddenly birthday gifts of bread machines, sound systems, ice cream makers and DVD's become prized keepsakes with fond memories attached..

Every little item becomes one of utmost importance while the elephant in the room grows bigger and bigger and bigger.... we each are looking for a piece of our life to hold on to.... while it is slipping through our fingers never to return....

So I will pack all of my "elephants" and he will keep all of his.... never to be discussed nor truly see the light of day.... while our things are sorted and sifted and make their way into our new lives...

Don't be afraid.....just breathe.... be kinder and more compassionate, love more often and more deeply, laugh....even when I want to cry, and always look for the joy. May 2008 be a year of discovery and wonder. Cheers!

I smile when I read those words as I realize that for the first time in my life, my resolutions came to pass - they made a difference….

I can’t WAIT to see what happens in 2009!!!!!

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